ff

this week has heralded a few great conversations about rape and rape culture. (some not so great, too, but let's not focus on those right now.)

people outside of the feminist blogisphere have been engaging in rape culture discussions triggered by the horrible so sad awful rage-tears-inducing gang rape in india. and. while i do agree with the following...

{@pushinghoops}

i am still grateful that soooomething is happening and people are thinking and speaking and learning.

jill over at feministe links to two really thoughtful pieces that discuss purity and virtue. read them both. they're worth spending some time with.  

{from e.j. graff's piece for the american prospect}

and then, too, mom sent me this little dude which is very yes and i like it very much. (because, say it with me friends, feminism is not about women wiiinnnnnning, its about gender equality and a world that is accepting of masculinity and feminity that fall outside of the rigid little set of descriptors we're all supposed to adhere to.)

and also, this video which a dear old friend (hi jess!!) sent me.

somedays my heart hurts so bad for the state of the world, and somedays i have slivers of hopefulness and somedays... and everydays i am thankful and thankful and thankful for my own personal world, where, jokes aside about 'erin's silly feminist posts', i am loved and respected by my friends and family and given autonomy. if only everyone was so lucky. (if only that, then... universe fixed...)

**and as always seems to be the case when i write an ff post that isn't 100% angry-sad a little in advance of friday, i came across this piece last night about two young men raping their jiu-jitsu teammate in a parking lot instead of driving her home safely like they said they would do. and oh, fuck it. ow. oh. my heart. my angry-sad heart.**

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saved my life

merry merry, everyone. all the folks are home and oh how wonderful it is.



happy monday. happy christmas. happy life.

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home

TODAY!!!

MAYBE I AM EXCITED TO GO HOME...

{borrowed from here}

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grandma's candy bowls

{borrowed from here}

sometimes (maybe around the holidays, say) do you sit in bed at night not being able to sleep and just crying happytears because the love that you have in you for the humans in your life is just too much to handle? and you think about them one by one and you're just trying to keep it together because holy holy holy god, how did you get so lucky and where on earth did they come from? and you can't, in this moment, even fathom being anything but happy and filled with love - even though you know you surely will feel sad or tired or mad or nothing soon enough, but right now it just doesn't even make sense to feel just exactly like this joyloveexplode?

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tomorrow you'll be worlds away

dearest future me:

soon you will have a day when you are feeling so many feelings. the nighttimesads and the anxietyattacks (or as aleena heard, the unsexyattacks). and when you do. remember today. remember how today is one of many practically perfect days. how you have a magical body that does magical strong things thanks to jenn, and how your friends are basically unicorns come to life and covered in sparkles, and how you probably couldn't dream up a better life than the one you are living. not really. if you're being honest about it. hold on to today.

xoxo
ek. (from now. the past. or something.)

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for the love of mo

{moustache types borrowed from here}

it is november, and you know that means that men everywhere will be puttin' some hair on their lips for a good cause. now i can't grow a moustache (neither can my brother but we'll come back to that...) so i am instead participating in the following event to show my support:

* extension room's MOVEMBER CHALLENGE!!! 

 

sunday november 18th, i will be dragging any and every male i can find to dance-jump-workout their way to health both for themselves and for others. and you get cocktails after?! FOR A GREAT CAUSE??!! pretty please check it out and join me. i double dog dare you!! (you wouldn't pass on a double dog dare, would you? that would be SUPER lame.)

but if you aren't in toronto, or are a big fraidey-cat, you can always help the cause in another way. the above-mentioned brother is raising money and growing a tragedy-stash for the cause. last year his first born came into the world to that sad sad moustache, and it is only right that my nephew-declan celebrates his first birthday with an equally terrifying-faced dad. (sorry chris. but. really. you're just not made for facial-hair-growing...)

* you can donate to chris' valiant efforts here!

happy movember, everyone. may the moustache wax be with you. note i have intentionally spelled moustache wrong throughout, to encourage a more entertaining pronunciation. yeah? yeah. good.

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neither you nor i

things are very good in toronto. i am feeling very good and glad. but also i am very much missing home right now. and the people who are it. my magical family. i am nervous at the possibility of christmas without emma & charlie. i don't even know what that would look like. i am sad that declan is getting so big. i hope he won't be as shy as me, and that he'll always be warm to his aunt erin. i am grateful to have love so big that it hurts.

tonight i'll be roasting pumpkin seeds. and sleeping in flannel sheets (even though it is not cold enough here, and i have to leave the window open so i don't roast myself). my heart will be in the prairies, driving from farm to farm with gerry, collecting candy and drinks.

{my prairie nephew in the prairie light}

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ff

{grandma old's rhubarb pie}

well. i was trying to decide what to write about this week. there were many options. but. then i was baking pies. and i spent the whole time thinking how amazing it would be to be baking those pies with my mom and grandma. mom would be pouring the wine as i swear and swear about my pastry struggles, and grandma would tell me what to do to fix the pastry, and it would just be the best thing. i am always surprised when i bake and cook, how much of it is my mom. lessons i didn't know i was getting. watching her, helping her, and listening to her stories about cooking and baking with her mother. i am so so grateful for the women i come from. strong and smart and funny and resilient. bold and brave. i could write for days and days about my grandmothers, who i think about all the time wishing i could learn more from them. it really is crazy how often and how much i miss them. and then there are my aunts. and my cousins. these are amazing women. and i'm so lucky to have come from this sturdy stock.

 {home before the kitchen renos, many christmases ago}

 {emma and me making a canadian thanksgiving in scotland back in 2008}

thank you thank you, universe. there's my thanksgiving focus. i wish this country (and this world) was smaller...

{grandma old and the cookie fridge}

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mm forever

you remember. that my lovely friends marc & mel got married? they did. i looooove them and i loooooved their wedding. it was such a joyful beautiful honest event.

here are a zillion photos of the lovely long weekend. they're kinda rubbish quality photos. but. you know. i took them through a teary filter of love and magic. so. they're the best to me. (and if you wanna know what true love looks like, there's marc & mel, sure, but there's also steph. the prettiest dark-haired one? steph who i loved so much my brain exploded. all the pictures of her, imagine rainbows and kittens bursting out of your eyes while you're looking at them. cause. that's what was happening to me. oh man. love. love love love. oh man and kerrianne. and laura and daniel. how on earth did marc & mel manage to have such amazing friends?!)

{the arrival. the prep. the hanging out.}

{the day. the hair. the faces.}

{the beeeach! the photos. the champagne!}

{the drunks. the car. (the moment marc & mel questioned letting kerrianne steph & i meet...)}

{the hugs. the party. the foooood and wiiiine!}

{the morning after. the breakfast.}

and there you have it. such a total joy. so lucky to be a part of this celebration. love forever, love love.

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back in time, do it over again

there are too many good things i could say about the time i spent with emma, charlie and crew. so. i'll just oh so quickly run through a few.

- primark

- hipster glasses passes

- chocolate cupcakecookies

- stella ella olla

- (...)

- wall climbing

- singing backup singer style

- fancy whisky fancy gin

- punting

- bunting

- singing while punting

- burgers with haloumi in

- bingo

- stick bugs

- jokes

and so so so much more. how lucky am i? it's cool, it's cool to love your family. as feist once said.

oh, and in case you were wondering. about the hipster glasses passes? don't even worry. here:

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