neither you nor i

things are very good in toronto. i am feeling very good and glad. but also i am very much missing home right now. and the people who are it. my magical family. i am nervous at the possibility of christmas without emma & charlie. i don't even know what that would look like. i am sad that declan is getting so big. i hope he won't be as shy as me, and that he'll always be warm to his aunt erin. i am grateful to have love so big that it hurts.

tonight i'll be roasting pumpkin seeds. and sleeping in flannel sheets (even though it is not cold enough here, and i have to leave the window open so i don't roast myself). my heart will be in the prairies, driving from farm to farm with gerry, collecting candy and drinks.

{my prairie nephew in the prairie light}

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the farm twenty minutes out of davidson

i know this is a spring collection, but it sure would make for good thanksgiving-wear. especially that first dress. with a little apron. oh yes. i could cook a mean meal in that. (speaking of which, yesterday's pie and turkey were both my best-yet. total thanksgiving win. so so pleased with myself and the most beautious humans who came to share it and brought so much deliciousness and warmth into our home. hoooray!)

{bottega veneta spring 2013, photos by marcus tondo at gorunway.com by way of style.com}

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dora mae

more cowgirls! more prairies! i am reading all the pretty horses, so it only seems right.

this girl i imagine to be a firecracker in one of them prairie schoolhouses my grandma used to teach in. where all the grades and ages are in one room. and she's too smart and driven. and she stirs up trouble. and, of course, she rides a horse like a total badass. her story will probably end in tragedy because, you know, the times. probably something like in carnivàle. but for now she is sassy and vital and oh so in charge of her destiny. nothing but dust and dirt and the horizon and the endless prairie sky reflecting in her eyes.

{marni resort 2013, photos courtesy of marni by way of style.com}

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yah yah

doesn't it suck when little old ladies are soooo much cooler than you?! tell me about it. well here's a way to latch onto their awesome. this is so saskatchewan babushka cowgirl it's bananabread! or. perogies and cabbage rolls...

{mother of pearl resort 2013, photos courtesy of mother of pearl by way of style.com}

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dig

my daniel. but now. and grown up. damn it, prairie heart. there is a storm coming. do not trust the brightness in the sky.

(but oh man do i hate the shoes in this collection... ugh. sorry. no. except for maybe the third image.)

{chloé resort 2013, photos courtesy of chloé by way of style.com}

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break my arms around the one i love

drop what you are doing. come quickly. rodarte.

rodarte does something to me that i can't properly explain. (though i will try through the next chunk of text to do just that. explain.)

it makes me want to cup the faces of strangers in my hands and tell them 'no, no, don't be sad. it will all be alright. there is hope...' (which i suspect would have the opposite of a calming effect on same strangers). it makes me want to cry. it makes me hopelessly happy and sensucht-y and ache-y. it feels so far away and so contemporary. nostalgic and modern as hell. the hardness of this world today that is cradled in an afghan and the understanding of our grandparents and the very different hardness of that world then. the understanding that life is hard and beautiful and fulfilling, and it could not be beautiful and fulfilling without the hardship.

or maybe i am projecting. but that is what i get from it.

and there is my prairie-heart. and there is that perfect hair and makeup. and the fantastic sickness in my stomach that is those shoes.

i had to try very hard not to just clip the entire collection. laura and kate mulleavy, you are my champions of wonderment.

{fall rodarte 2012, photos by monica feudi at feudiguaineri.com by way of style.com}

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